The internet. Some have called it humankind’s greatest folly. A boundless ocean of vitriol, depravity, scams, misinformation, and meaningless competitions for clout. If this technology is what brought us to our present, how can it be any good?
But now and then, we are reminded of the true potential encoded in our digital platforms. One searing question will cut through the noise, demanding unified attention as if it is a matter of life and death, or perhaps the reason we have been brought together in the first place. These are the hypotheticals that seize our imagination, ignite uproarious debate, and, since they can have no definite answer, keep us up till the wee hours of the night.
Apparently first proposed on TikTok several years ago, the thought experiment galvanizing social media this past week falls into the classic “who would win” framework of a speculative knockout fight between people and/or wild creatures. In this case, the combatants are, to one side, a group of 100 unspecified men — and, on the other, a single gorilla, one of those noble herbivorous great apes found in equatorial Africa. Why such a confrontation would ever occur and what the participants may have done to deserve such a fate is irrelevant. The point is to argue the plausibility of either the humans or the lone silverback prevailing in a battle of brawn. Opinions differ, as you’d probably guess, and while many have insisted that dozens of mere men stand no chance against a mighty gorilla, it was a contrarian post on X that really kicked this conversation into high gear: “i think 100 n—-s could beat 1 gorilla everybody just gotta be dedicated to the shit,” wrote user @DreamChasnMike last Thursday, unleashing total gorilla-fight mania.
The memes exploded from there. People envisioned all manner of outcome, from the gorilla “going to the club after smoking 100 dumb mfs,” or letting the last human live “so he can tell everyone what happened,” to the humans strategizing how to restrain a 400-pound ape together, playing dead once the limbs start flying, or potentially defecting for an alliance with their primate cousin. “I’m helping the gorilla,” wrote comedian Niles Abston, adding, “fuck yall. This job market overcrowded.” Another X user floated the idea of communicating to the gorilla, via sign language, “Me Michael. Michael friend gorilla. No fight gorilla. Michael betray man for friend gorilla.” Meanwhile, the Encyclopedia Britannica posted a “100 Men vs. 1 Gorilla Study Pack™️,” consisting of anatomical diagrams of both humans and gorillas, and YouTuber MrBeast shared a thumbnail for a fake video based on the concept, jokingly writing, “Need 100 men to test this, any volunteers?” Tech oligarch Elon Musk was among those to answer the call, replying, “Sure, what’s the worst that could happen?”
Now, it’s all well and good to game out this kind of preposterous scheme in a lively conversation at the bar or in your group chats, with only an amateur’s comprehension of the factors involved. But as long as the matter has consumed public online discourse, we can go ahead and avail ourselves of the experts to be found through these same social channels. That’s why Rolling Stone has seen fit to waste the time of three professionals qualified to tell us, once and for all, how a 100-guys-vs.-one-gorilla matchup would go.
“As a wildlife conservationist, I would never want to see this come to fruition,” cautions Ron Magill, a wildlife photographer and conservationist who serves as communications director of Zoo Miami, who is often called to weigh in on these wacky animal inquiries for the local sports program The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz. Magill also points out that from a practical perspective, “gorillas are in fact ‘gentle giants,’ and would avoid this conflict whenever possible,” with a silverback likely only becoming aggressive to protect his family. “What this question proves is that some people have too much time on their hands and love to create scenarios that help feed morbid curiosity,” he says. “But then again, here I am playing along.”
In Magill’s view, 100 men in their twenties and excellent physical condition could ultimately defeat a gorilla if they “are committed and go in united.” That doesn’t mean it would be pretty. The human assault force “would have to expect severe collateral damage that could easily include death from broken necks, severe arterial bite wounds, massive concussions leading to fatal brain bleeds, and asphyxiation from other men piling on top of them,” Magill says. “It could be a kamikaze mission for the men closest to the gorilla.” Even some who survive might be left paralyzed or disfigured. “If they are willing to accept this,” he says, “the group should be able to overtake the gorilla and inflict enough blunt force trauma combined with severe twisting of the head and neck while simultaneously inflicting severe abdominal punches, that the gorilla would eventually succumb to either a broken neck, internal organ damage, or asphyxiation.” This would only be possible, he theorizes, by moving as a team, “working together to envelop the gorilla and create a human straightjacket” so that the gorilla can’t “properly breathe or extend its limbs.” Of course, he notes, the men pressed against the gorilla in this attack could easily perish as well.
Michelle Rodrigues, a primatologist, conservation scientist and member of the International Union for Conservation of Nature’s Primate Specialist Group focused on human-primate interactions, agrees that under normal circumstances, a gorilla won’t be squaring up against 100 men. “As strong as gorillas are, and as much damage as their canines can do, it’s not a fair fight, and a sensible gorilla would try to flee,” she tells Rolling Stone. “But via numerical odds assessment, I don’t think there’s much chance of a gorilla winning the fight when they have 100 humans to contend with.”
A gorilla on its own, Rodrigues says, faces a disadvantage beyond just being outnumbered. “Both gorillas and humans are social animals, and safety in numbers is in important point in their decision-making to engage in fights,” she explains. “Gorillas are group-living animals, and when male gorillas do not have a group of females to lead or co-lead, they are instead found in bachelor groups with other males. It’s rarer to find one on their own, and the social context influences the degree to which they would be willing to fight. The large size, muscle mass, and sharp canines that make silverback gorillas formidable opponents arose from male-male competition, and males are most likely to fight their hardest when they are defending a group. However, gorillas are not typically aggressive and pick their battles,” Rodrigues reiterates. Moreover, primates have demonstrated that they take numbers into account when making territorial moves. Chimpanzees, whose social organization allows them to make violent and sometimes lethal territorial raids on rival groups, “make assessments based on vocalizations of the subgroup size of the ‘enemy’ chimps, and are more likely to attack when the numerical odds are in their favor,” Rodrigues says.
Obviously, if the 100 men are able to communicate and cooperate, that improves their chances of taking down a gorilla — we’re not really different from other primates in that respect. But if they wanted to take down a mammal group of comparable size? That could be a different story. Rodrigues mentions March Mammal Madness, an annual tournament held by biology educators in which animals compete one-on-one, with victories decided by a mix of close research and probabilistic chance. “There was one year with a social mammals division, where group-living mammals got to compete with their social groups,” Rodrigues says. Neanderthals, our archaic human relatives, were included in that bracket, “but surprisingly they did not make it to the end.”
There are other practical considerations to the gorilla-vs.-100-man setup. “As a scientist, I have many questions,” says Cat Hobaiter, a primatologist and professor at Scotland’s University of St Andrews who studies communication and cognition in wild apes. “Are these 100 average guys, or 99 average guys and The Rock?” She assumes the former and a limited amount of space for the fight, so “they’re coming at [the gorilla] maybe 6 or 8 guys at a time, no weapons allowed.”
“Most folks focus first on size,” Hobaiter says. “Gorillas are big — a large silverback can be about 440 pounds — but not dramatically so compared to 100 men. Much more important is how powerful they are. All apes have two types of muscle fibers: slow twitch and fast twitch. Fast twitch give you explosive power. Human muscles are about half and half, other apes all have more fast twitch than slow, but gorilla muscles are an incredible 85-plus-percent fast twitch fibers — the most of any ape. So, pound for pound of muscle mass, they are much much much more powerful than we are.” She alludes to other adaptations that could give a gorilla the edge, depending on environmental circumstances. “If we’re talking mountain gorillas, they’re high-altitude adapted, living at about 10,000 feet, the sort of height that has an average human panting just going up a few stairs,” Hobaiter says.
With the men prevented from rushing the gorilla all at once, as in Magill’s calculations, they face long odds, Hobaiter believes: “Honestly, 100 guys wouldn’t stand a chance,” she says. “They’re going to be swatting at him like out-of-breath children, and a single one of his punches would floor them. And if the next 92 guys don’t realize they don’t stand a chance after he has knocked the first eight out without breaking a sweat, I’ve got to assume we’re not talking about folks who are going to outsmart him.”
Hobaiter’s conclusion goes to show that even among the specialized academics, there is room for dispute around primate-on-primate smackdowns. But, like her peers, she doesn’t see a gorilla getting involved in this nonsense to begin with. “The only chance the humans would have is that gorillas are the most relaxed, peaceful, fun-loving apes I’ve ever had the privilege of working with,” Hobaiter says. “Most silverbacks would much rather take a nap, eat some good food, play with the kids, take another nap… gorillas know how to live a pretty good life, and none of it is wasted wondering if they could knock out 100 humans.”
That’s because they don’t have social media. Yet.
